Finding Friends after the Playground

Individual Blog Post

Friday, January 27

by: reference

“Sometimes I think being able to buy beer and go to bed whenever I want just doesn’t make up for all the other stuff that comes with adulthood.” - Some wise words from a friend (paraphrased).

I’ve been thinking lately about the daunting task of making friendship as an adult. As a child we have no reservations about approaching other children and asking to play. But as adults – even though we have all theoretically improved our social skills – we are mortified by the thought of being so frank with our feelings.

This very thing is the topic of the recent book MWF seeking BFF in which author Rachel Bertsche spends a year seeking a new best friend in a new city. The book combines scientific research with Bertsche’s descriptions of her 52 friends dates (one per each week of the year). The results are, not surprisingly, a mixed bag. The journey speaks to an experience that many of us can relate to. While on her quest she develops a better understanding of what friendship means and how she can improve her own friend-making and –sustaining skills. Worth checking out if it’s a topic you find yourself giving some thought to. And who knows, maybe it will help you turn some of your own “friend crushes” (my phrase, not Bertsche’s) into actual friends!

Other books on making friends and connections: